Thursday 20 January 2011

Things to consider BEFORE starting a family (Part 2 - SAHM-ness)

Part Two of my mini-feature on 'things to consider BEFORE starting a family'... 

work/life balance... do you or your partner work away from home a lot? If you do, is that something you would like to continue once you become parents? If not, what can you do to make plans for changing it...?

can you afford the lifestyle that you want to have as a ‘yummy mummy’ (I’m assuming here that no-one intends to become a ‘frumpy mummy’)...

If you want to be a SAHM ('stay at home Mum' to the uninitiated) who drinks coffee, eats muffins and arranges craft sessions for your kiddies, do you have enough savings to be one income down? For how long? If the answer is no/not sure, is your partner happy to work enough hours to pay for your coffee, muffins and craft materials and other really exciting things that you get to do when you're a SAHM?!  Are you happy to see your partner less so that he can pay for your bits and pieces? I guess this is related to finances and definitely something to think about BEFOREhand. I think that checking out your company's and country's rules for maternity pay/leave is a useful thing to do. Better to know in advance right, and then you can prepare for it a bit... 

- are you ready to commit to being a SAHM? Just about everyone I know who doesn't have kids tells me that they want to be a SAHM. They say they want to spend as much time as possible enjoying their kid's formative years. I would have told you exactly the same thing 4 years ago. Speaking as a Mum, its  (much) harder to stay home all day every day than being at work - and I'm yet to meet a Mum - SAHM or working mum who disagrees with me. Being a SAHM means being a mum, nanny, wife, daycarer, cleaner, cooker - all in one, 24/7. If you're not 100% sure that being a SAHM is for you then consider ways to keep your foot in the employment door should you decide to work (dare I say it) 'part time' or even return to work 'full-time' (blasphemy!). keep your skills up-to-date, keep in contact with your clients, visit work, know what is going on..so that if you decide you do want to go back at some point, you still have a 'place'...

I think that's all for now, but of course, as I live and learn, I will add to these musings.

I'd love to know what others' experiences of being a SAHM are, just in case next time around I decide to do just that...!

Mrs O
x



2 comments:

  1. Your picture looks so Nigerian....wondering if you are, cos I am also a full blown Nigerian. My husband is too :)

    You are right about considering lots of scenarios when starting a family. Some of this we neglected because we had our daughter in college.

    Nice seeing you around :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hi 'Working Mom'

    Thanks for the comment!

    Not Nigerian - just like Gele lol ..we too had daughter without considering all these things..so these are my two-pennies worth! : )

    ReplyDelete

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