Little Miss O says the funniest things...about poo and willies! : \

So, yesterday was Mother's Day here in the UK and Little Miss O and her Daddy took me to the farm - an ice-cream farm! It really was such a lovely way to spend the day...really!


This was Little Miss O's first trip to a real 'working' farm, where she got to see the cows being milked and even have a go with a 'pretend' cow. She loved seeing the pigs sleeping in their own doo doo (I think I am giving up pork as a result of this guys!).. she also loved seeing the miniature horses and stroking the fluffy sheep! I even plucked up the courage to touch the animals - errrrr the things you do to teach your kids eh!



Pigs at Cheshire ice-cream farm

Anyhoo, onto the funny part - when one of the cows had finished being milked, she (the cow) started walking away with her (cow) pals. Then suddenly, milk started to leak from her mahoosive udder. Cue Little Miss O, shrieking with excitement:


"ooooh, THAT's a big willy! Look, he's wee'd himself!"


Again guys, can you spell mortified! The whole crowd (and there were LOTS of kids, parents, Grandparents to witness the scene) burst out laughing! I shrunk, and then once I had recovered from the initial horror (!), I decided to educate my child. I explained that 1) its a female (Mummy cow), because only 'Mummy cows' have milk; 2) as she is a 'Mummy cow', she doesn't have a 'willy' but has 'udders' which are just like (and I used this loosely!) Mummy's breasts; 3) the cow wasn't 'weeing herself', but her milk has just leaked...


She seemed to understand the female/male issue but still looked concerned that the cow did not use the toilet for her 'wee'... I mean, even Little Miss O understands that you should not 'wee' on the floor...


This incident, coupled with Little Miss O complaining every 5 minutes that 'it STINKS here', 'it smells of poo poo Mummy, yuck!' made me SO happy that we took her. Let me tell you, we are NOT 'farm people', we are very much urbanites - and happy with this BUT we want Little Miss O to have experiences - we want her to know that the 'poo' smell is manure and cow pats! We want her to be knowledgeable - even if that means spending the day at the farm! For us, a farm that makes ice-cream (that was near orgasmic, I have to add) was the perfect day out for us...and an easy way to ease us into the outdoors. We're looking forward to doing more things like this with Little Miss O...not just on obligatory holidays, but regularly...


Happy Belated Mother's Day


Mrs O
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How I really got my PhD - part 3...

...a few more tips and things that helped me through my PhD.

A DEDICATED PERSON: I've alluded before to the idea of it taking a village to raise a child idea and accepting or asking for help whenever you have an inkling of needing it! Well, I also think if you can manage it, find an extra-special person to support you. I had my (amazing!) husband, but it doesn’t actually matter who it is. The person just needs to be totally in tune with you and be there for you. Someone who is a confidante. Bear in mind though, that even your No #1 go-to person can run out of energy – just like you, they are human. They need a break too. For the times when they just can’t take any more, it’s useful to have someone else – luckily I had one of these too, though I’m not sure she knows how great she was. I’ll be sure to tell her again!

A DEDICATED SPACE: Create a space that is for you. A space where you can leave your books for an hour (to rest/play/cook/clean) and where you can be sure that when you get back, they’ll still be there. Luckily, we have a 3 bedroom house, so one room is ‘our’ MY study. To an outsider its full of post-its, pin board, spidergrams, stacks of paper piled randomly, topped with books and journal articles. To me, this was the basis of my work – if anything was touched – I’d know. Even if it’s just a corner in your lounge/bedroom, try to have a small space that is yours. A space where you get into the ‘zone’ and get your geek on!

YOU time: OK, I know I just said that you should focus on your studies BUT you’ve gotta have something else too. Something that isn’t kid-related or study-related, but something that is JUST.FOR.YOU. Something that YOU enjoy. I know you might think you don’t have time – but it’s not true. You DO have time for you, you just have to adjust your timetable and take that time out. It will mean a tiny bit less time studying, or a tiny bit less time with your loved ones BUT investing in you is an investment in your family. It’s just like on a plane, they tell you to put your life jacket on first, before helping others – there’s a reason for that. So, to clarify, you need to have it – just don’t let it take over.

KNOW WHEN TO STOP: A strong woman knows when to stop. When it is all just too much or too hard – stop. Like I said, you don’t have to prove anything to anyone. If deep down you really really feel you need a break from your studies – take the break. If you feel you need a break from your child(ren) – take the break. Everyone will thank you and it really is OK. I know someone who took 18 months off from a 3 year course because it all got too much. She went back, finished and has two very grown and handsome sons, a PhD and has also had a fabulous career! If she can do it, so can you!

For now, I think those are about all the tips that I have re. getting through your studies/any life challenge I suppose, as a Mummy or anyone..

Mrs O

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Continuing on then with stuff that I don't want to forget and things that might help someone else in cyberspace in a similar situation - here’s my take on comparing yourself to other Mums, making the most of ‘team Mum’, the pitfalls of juggling too much and the benefits of problem sharing.

DON’T MAKE COMPARISONS: Quit looking at others for comparison. So what if all the people you went to school/university with are enjoying wild crazy professional lives with the disposable income to match. You keep studying – yours will come later, and by that time, your kid(s) will be grown, you’ll have more disposable income than they have now and you’ll have the maturity to know how to use it! (Or you’ll blow it all on expensive handbags – but hey, that’s your prerogative!)

You are living your life, so just do the very best with it that you can – after all, that is all everyone else is doing too. Other people’s lives only look greener from your side. Remember though, the grass is greenest where you water it! Just do the best that you can do with what you’ve got.

‘TEAM MUM’: If you want to pass, then you just have to accept help from Team Mum – they want to help you believe it or not. So, quit the denial. Yes, I know it’s hard – especially as us young Mums often think we have to prove that we can handle it all despite our age or lack of preparedness for parenting.

Trust me, you don’t have to prove anything. No one is waiting for you to fall and you’ll be happier for just saying ‘yes please’ and grabbing all help – with both hands! ‘Help’ could mean anything from your Mum having the kid(s) for a day, allowing a prolific commenter to write a guest post for your blog (Note from Young Mommy: “YES!”) or borrowing a coursemate’s book. The funny thing about help is that if every time you decline help, the ‘giver’ might think that you genuinely don’t want/need it, when in fact you’re just being stubborn/proud/in denial (delete as appropriate).

A PROBLEM SHARED IS A PROBLEM HALVED: Make friends with other Mums (or Dads) at playgroup, nursery – wherever! Just as I said before, these people know what you’re going through with your kid(s). Even if they’re 35, and seem to have everything, it’s nice to see that their kids act up just as much as yours do and that your kid’s behaviour is more a result of them being kids and not a result of your hectic (fine, I’m making assumptions) parenting schedule. No parent is perfect, but sometimes you need to see other less than perfect parents to really believe it!

DON’T JUGGLE TOO MUCH: Try not to do too many things at once. Raising a child(ren) is hard enough, never mind doing it whilst trying to figure who you are and what you’re about (typically done during our teens and twenties). If you then add studying – it’s enough on one plate – don’t you think? It’s not that I believe the ‘jack of all trades, master of none’ proverb, it’s just that if you want to pass, you do need to be able to focus and the fewer distractions, the more able you will be to create a masterpiece in your studies. Creating that masterpiece will give you the leverage to do all sorts of things afterwards.

HAVING A PLAN: Make the plan and try try try to stick to it. Now, don’t feel bad if it goes awry sometimes. I always have a plan – whatever the situation. BUT, I only stick to it about 50% of the time, and still I continue to make my own little plans. Let me explain. You see, for me, the process of making a plan helps me to see all the things that I have to do. Sure, I often freak out when I see the list of ‘must-dos’ and then I pray on it. BUT, once I work out my priorities and separate them from the ‘would like to dos’, then I start having a real plan, and having that little piece of paper/napkin/bus ticket/envelope makes me feel that little bit more secure – that little bit more in control. If I fall off my plan. I don’t panic, I just make a new one. I don’t know if this is good advice really, but it’s worked for me. I am sure God has something to do with me falling off certain plans in order to get back on the right plan – his plan!

Mrs O

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