Monday, 10 January 2011
Then and Now - Mrs O Update
Everyone aged 30 and younger was excited - in their heads it was paaarty time! Everyone who had been through it themselves gave us the 'hmmm, are these kids sure they know what they're letting themselves in for..' eyes. Some people decided to tell use exactly what we were in for. In fact, in each of the 5/6 weddings that we attended the year before our own, there was always some sort of reference to how hard marriage would be and how we should be prepared for that. I know that life isn't a bed of roses, but why was everyone trying to rain on my parade?! I was a 'bride2b', why couldn't they just be excited! Married folk we know shared (sometimes graphic) stories about their lives and how it nearly broke their marriages and we were sat thinking -
'ummm are we doing the right thing here?'
I mean, we already lived together, we had already started a family; what could marriage change for the good when people felt the need to wish us 'luck'.
'things are good now, why change them?'
Over the past 6 years we've been through some major life events already - the kind of life events that drive couples apart - married or not. I'm talking family *ish*, nosey parkers, unemployment, illness, becoming parents, moving house, death of people close to us and then there were a couple of decades of bad habits that we both had to overcome in order simply to 'get on' with each other, whilst living under the same roof...
As though our relationship had not already been tested enough, we had yet another curve-ball thrown painfully at us in the midst of our wedding planning.
It was crunch time; time to decide properly - were we really ready to be married and not just get married? *Big difference*
We discussed our problem and realised that as a couple, we wanted to take this step. Then and there, we made a pre-marital pact -
'to be together forever - regardless'.
Following our curveball, we made things 'good' again - better than before. The best yet, actually.
We worked through our *ish* because we wanted to. We never gave up on our relationship and as of last year, we have made an official, legal, and most importantly spiritual commitment to each other -
'to be together, forever - regardless'
I don't know about Mr O, but that''s the biggest promise I've ever made. I feel that this post just can't do justice to the feelings and emotion that surround of marriage, but trust me - its there.
So one year on and counting - where are we? Well, so far, marriage has not been any of those horrific things that 'marrieds' told us about. Sure, it's been a challenging year, but nothing that love couldn't conquer. I think we've already had our fair share major curve-balls anyway...and if there is more to come, I know that with Mr O by my side, we can overcome anything!
Love for me is what I imagine heroin to be like. Now that I've gotten my fix (of love), I feel that everyone else should join me...I believe that love is a beautiful thing and that everyone should fall in love...
Me? Well, I get to do it (fall in love!) over and over again with Mr O - can't get better than that!